Photo by Will Porada on Unsplash

Eighteen Holes, Eighteen Plauges: Putting the (Golf) Cart Before the Remorse

By Joanne Light

Imagine that Cathy Jones and company from “This Hour has Twenty Two Minutes” air a skit, in which they try to play golf on the coastal headland, formerly known as Owls Head Provincial Park… now turned topsy-turvy with tawdry turf.

Eighteen plagues, one for each hole are forthcoming :

1/ Black flies, gouging flesh from ears like a divot from a fairway,

2/ Clouds of mosquitoes sucking blood from the tanned forearms of those who came to relax and suck bloody Marys,